Meet Lindsey Kee

22 years old/Capricorn/Distinguished Cage Fighter

Lindsey is a recent college graduate of Indiana University with a major in Kickin’ Ass and a minor in Takin’ Names. She is a competition level badger wrestler and is a champion weight lifter. She worked for a couple of years as a Clinical Research Assistant. Lindsey likes red toasters but not red blenders. She spends most of her spare time reading Eli Whitney novels.

For tips on badger wrestling or to discuss the depth of Eli Whitney’s fictional character development, email Lin here.

Meet Saben Emmons

24 years old/Aquarius/Stationary Unicycle Kung Fu Master

Saben is a recently released cube farm prisoner and is a renowned emu jockey. He has worked in IT for the past 9 years and has freakishly large feet (no joke). Saben enjoys long walks on the beach and songs about norwhals. He graduated from Ivy Tech College but learned most of his mad skills on the mean streets of French Lick, Indiana. Saben hopes to someday be a professional whistler.

For whistling lessons (prices may vary) and heroic tales of cube farm life,
email Saben here.